Career Questions and Answers
How can I get my nineteen year old chambermaid to sleep in her own bed?
Asked by Lord Charles
I have always tried to maintain good relationships with the staff but for several months now I have woken up each morning to find that my nineteen year old chambermaid has crept into my bed during the night.
Thankfully my wife’s visits to the east wing are increasingly occasional – I would otherwise find myself at a loss to provide a convincing explanation to this situation.
Has anyone else experienced this problem?
A:
Best Answer:
Its a damned nuisance I know, the only sure fire way of stopping it is to sell her to a brothel in the Yemen. It solves a few problems,
1) She doesn't sneak into your bed
2) You get £500 from Mustapha Dump the pimp.
Or if you are feeling benevolent send her along to Smythe Hall, I won't complain.
A:
Dont fuck her this time!
Answered by loldawg
A:
All the time
LOL
Answered by My Take on It
A:
No, but I wish I had your problems...! LOL
Answered by KnowhereMan
A:
I find this sort of occurance to be a damnable nuisance. Still, if it's on offer then show the fox to the hounds.
Answered by matthew
A:
It is rough in the world of Lord Charles.
Answered by Dan K
A:
Sorry Lord Charles, but i do not think that there is a solution to your little friend. It is a tough world, i do say.
Answered by OliviaATL
A:
I caught a glimpse of your chambermaid, Zoe, on The X-Factor last night, skiving off work again.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4jxcljZ8xwc
Maybe you could give a considered critique of her singing, that might get rid of her. I don't know how you cope!
Answered by Big Bad BOB MacBob
A:
I say old bean, try Mushy Peas !!
help yourself to at least two portions per evening and the resulting flatulence will even keep the grim reaper away !
tally ho
Answered by Lord Faversham-Shaftsworthy
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You've only got this problem with one chamber maid? Change your after shave.
Answered by Citizen DeCat
A:
Actually, old boy, I would suggest a rather different approach to the problem.
I should imagine that in fact, your primary worry is that Her Ladyship might find the aforementioned wench in your bed, and be somewhat perturbed. Has it occurred to you that by far the best solution would in fact be to dispose not of the wench, but of Her Ladyship? Thereby making way for a somewhat more relaxed relationship with the wench?
Give it some thought, old man, and I'm sure you'll see I'm right.
Answered by Dicko
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